Wow I have been struggling. Not so much with the food and exercise, it's been what I've been thinking! If I could just do what I know to do without analysing it and worrying about everything I would be so much better off!! I've been struggling since last September!! So frustrating!
The past months, I've been going through the motions, doing what I'm supposed to do, but I've had the biggest ugliest cloud handing over my head. It's like the biggest sense of dread ever!! Daily I was having trouble facing the grind of it all!!!
Today it feels like the clouds of depression have lifted off and I'm seeing nothing but blue skies ahead!! Thank God, because I could feel that I was slowly losing myself to the dark side!!
Now I feel like I can do what I need to do. Already I got one thing done that I wanted to do and that was getting a new workout outfit!! I found the cutest top and jacket!! They are form fitting and very comfortable!! Of course the shirt is pink and very bright. This is usually not a color I would pick, I'm an all black girl!! You know, because black makes you look slimmer ~ right? Anyway, wearing this shirt will be a stretch that I'm willing to take!! Oh and then it's tight fitting that's another stretch!!! (Get it?) Anyway, just finding this stuff in a regular clothes store is encouraging!! So much fun!
Even though I'm still injured, I can just barely get out of a chair without screaming, I am excited to get back to my exercise. Fortunately I'm able to walk, so I will be able to hit the treadmill ~ well at least do what I can. So happy that I at least want to exercise and I'm excited to get back to my routine!!
Also, I'm already back to my regular food, which is making me feel a lot better. It's not that I had too much food, just a little richer than I'm used to. So glad to get back to normal!
Anyway, I don't know what was up with me or why I had to go through this, I'm excited that I finally feel like I did prior to September!! I have hope again, I CAN DO THIS and I will achieve my goals!!
How about you? Are you doing well?
Keep focused!!
Yay for hope! Yay for beating that dark side! I so relate to the funk of dark thoughts. Sometimes it would be nice to be a man and not deal with all the emotional aspects of our thoughts (as much at least). But we have to master our thoughts!
ReplyDeleteYes, there are blue skies. Even when all we see are dark clouds, we have to know there are blue skies above them until we do see them again. So glad you are feeling better! Have fun with your work outs and don't injure yourself. Be gentle with yourself girl!
Happy New Year!! God bless!!
~Margene
That's so lovely to hear - the dark cloud stuff is nearly unbearable for me, I find it so difficult to stay on track with my food plan if I am just going through the motions.
ReplyDeleteLong may the lightness continue. What a great way to usher in a new year. All the best.
Glad you are ok. Like what Margene said take care of yourself. smile
ReplyDeleteI'm doing better than I was! :) Glad you're back!!!
ReplyDeleteI'm loving the occassional blue skies and sunshine today. I hopoe you're indulging! :)
I'm so glad you're feeling better, at least emotionally!
ReplyDeleteI'm feeling AWESOME and so ready to get back to the gym once my kid returns to school next week. I love her dearly, but I miss me time! :)
YAY! I'm SO glad you're feeling better! Like you, it feels like the clouds have finally lifted for me too and everything is much clearer now. 2011 is going to be our year, Joy! You just watch! :)
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry about the depression. It is a bad thing, and I'm glad you're tackling it.
ReplyDeleteLori
So glad to see you back, Joy! And I'm glad that you are recovering from your injury...now, stay safe and healthy, please :)
ReplyDeleteBTW, LOVE the new look of the blog. Reminds me of spring....ah, I remember Spring.
ReplyDeleteWelcome back! The struggles are all part of the journey!
ReplyDeletethat's great... that you have hope again. Hold onto it. Keep your eye on the prize. You, I mean we'll get there. And sometimes, going through the motions is okay. It keeps us going until we get our mojo back.
ReplyDeleteThank you for your support. I'm excited for the coming year. Great things are awaiting us...
I think sometimes we go through a funk that is buried deep in our subconcious. Our weight sometimes does things for us that even we can't comprehend, and when we push through these walls it can be hard. Plus with the injury, it can put you in a bad place mentally. Glad you are back and feeling good.
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