Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Focus on the "Do's"...Not the "Don'ts"!

I got this little tip from one of my new favorite stores ~

Aries Apparel
Weekly Tip-Off

Focus on the "Do's"...Not the "Don'ts"!

Ever catch yourself thinking more about the food you shouldn't have, rather than the food that'll make you feel better in the long run? Sometimes focusing on something you shouldn't do, makes you want to do it that much more! Here are a few tips to help you stay focused on eating healthy, and balanced. This way, you won't find yourself ravenous mid-afternoon, ordering that pizza before you can stop yourself!

Eat breakfast
Eat 5 times a day (3 meals, 2 snacks)
Pack snacks each night for the next day
(nuts, vegetables with hummus, rice cakes)
Have meals with protein, carbs and healthy fats
Keep a food journal!

I don't know if their tips will help you, but it's something to think about.

Personally, I'm finding, since I've started really looking at my diet and cleaning it up, that I'm thinking WAAAAYYYY to much about food. I'm thinking about what I can't have, instead of thinking about the healthy choices I'm making and how good I feel. 

That's it ~ I'm switching my thinking!

I feel healthy....I feel good....Yeah!!

How about you....Are you thinking about what you can't have?

Keep focused

Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Non Scale Victory!

As you may know, I'm was down to 204 pounds (my lowest weight in years.....I mean years!!!) in November. I maintained that weight all through Christmas and then we planned a vacation to Austin, where instead of indulging in vacation food, I decided to focus on my weight lost and fitness plan. I worked my butt off in the gym...for hours, I halved everything with my Hubby....Did not have a full meal to myself. We ordered chicken and veggies most of the time, did have 1 pasta and 1 Mexican meal. Again all halved, Hubby always getting the larger share of everything. I did all this only to come back 9 pounds up! HUH!?!?!

Well I have struggled with those 9 pounds and I have 5 more to go to get back to 204 pounds. It's been difficult and frustrating. Anyway, I went to see my trainer last night and we decided it was time to do a little measuring.

Chest down 1"
Waist down 3/4"
Hips down 2 1/2" - WOW!!
Thighs up 1/2" (All those squats and lunges!!)
Calves down 1"

4.75" off!! This was down from my measure date of 11/14/11. So even though the scale is not reflecting weight loss, my body is!! I will take it!!

Also, this guy was talking to my trainer and he said, "You're really working her!" and my trainer said, "She's doing great" and he said. "Yeah, she really rocks!"

Weird, I'm sitting right there and this whole conversation is going on....Part of me wanted to say, "Hey, I can hear you!!" The other part was really excited to hear what he had to say!!

More fun stuff.....Hubby is on board with this whole health and fitness thing. We are both taking the day off on Friday and we are strategizing our food. We are cleaning out our cupboards and all his hiding places. Then we are going shopping and then for a bike ride. (I'm thinking about doing something crazy, but I want to map out the route first!)

I AM SO EXCITED AND JAZZED to have a partner in this next phase of my journey. Not that he's not been there supporting me, but now, he's going to do the same thing I am and will come to the gym with me more. That will be awesome!!

Good things are happening!!!

How are you doing?  Do you have some non scale victories to share?

Keep focused!

Monday, February 27, 2012

Just a little encouragement!

For the fun of it....Enjoy your day today. Give out extra hugs, be willing to get some back. Call an old friend. Send a card. Pay for someones lunch. Stop and smell the roses....Oh I know it's winter, they're not in bloom.....but stop and enjoy nature around you. Take a walk, ride your bike, snow shoe, sled, jump in a mud puddle. Do something fun today!

For your Health and Fitness Plan....DO everything you know to do. Keep your sights on your goal. Resist the temptation to go back to your old ways. Be diligent and purposeful today in all that you do! Keep pushing forward and don't stop. You can do it!!

For help....Pray, read your Bible, listen to the Lord!

If you are depressed....Help others!

Keep focused!

Friday, February 24, 2012

NEVER thought I could do it!!

Last night I had a fabulous opportunity to spend some quality time with my family. For my Hubby's 57th birthday, we all went to Safari Sam's to celebrate!!  This place claims that they have Oregon’s Largest Jungle Gym. It's totally a kids fun house, but it is also fun for adults. They have a large play structure with mazes, rope ladders, slides, tubes, etc. So we had a blast chasing the grandchildren around and keeping up with them while they enjoyed the structures.

There is one part of the course that is a little challenging and it is.....Dun dun dunnnnnnn...

It's the......Black Diamond Challenge Course

This course is designed for kids nine and up and is more physically demanding. Even to get on the course, you have to scale a 4 1/2 foot padded block to enter - with no hand holds or anything. Just a block. So with my little competitive daughters encouragement, she prodded me to try it. Here I'm only 5'4" tall and the block is almost as tall as I am. Anyway I just could not see how I was going to get on the thing. So I watched her do it and of course, she shimmied her skinny butt up the block with no problem. So she's sitting up there challenging me and pushing me to try. So I thought, well ok......So I give it a running try and barely get my feet off the floor only to run into the block with a thud! Of course, she's up there laughing her head off and enjoying my moment of defeat.....I said moment.........Because that fueled me even more try it again. So I take off, I hug the block, I grab anything I can, I get stuck for a moment and before you know, I shimmied my skinny butt up the block and there I was on the Black Diamond Challenge Course!!!

I'm sure it was a sight to watch, but I did not care!!! Once I got up there, I was able to skinny through the little parts, climb up the vertical rope ladders, scale down the up and down rope ladders, which scared me a little and I was able to pull myself up with ropes, and whatever challenge they dished out. I did the whole thing following after my daughter and even took the lead when she was complaining about a rope ladder. I climbed it like I've climbed rope ladders my whole life!!

Even when I was a kid, I don't think I ever was that aggressive in getting something like this accomplished. When we were done, I was a sweaty mess and I did not care what anybody thought about it.  I HAD A BLAST!!!

IT WAS SO MUCH FUN!!!!

That's what you get when you get physically fit!!

The other thing I did yesterday was I did an Apheresis donation. This is a 2+ hour process in which blood is drawn from a donor and separated into its components, some of which are retained, such as plasma or platelets, and the remainder returned by transfusion to the donor ~ Exciting huh? Anyway, I have not donated in a while, especially at this weight and usually when they hook me up, the machine does it thing without any problems. Well yesterday, they had nothing but trouble with me. Since I've lost so much weight, it's harder for me to stay warm and you need to be really warm for the veins in the arm to do their thing. Anyway, my machine was alarming like crazy. Finally, to get me warm, they had so many blankets and heating pads on me that you could barely see my head. Before I lost weight I would never get cold. I mean it would have to be subfreezing for me to even wear a coat. Now I'm always cold.

That's what happened, to me, since I've lost weight!

So good things are happening!!!

I have a new and great attitude with so much to look forward to!!

How are you? What new?

Keep focused!

Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Affirmations

The other night I was talking to my new trainer about my weight loss and fitness journey. I told her of my recent frustration with this extra 6 pounds. I admitted to her that well....obviously, I'm not true to my calorie intake. I know what the paper says, but obviously my body is telling me different......So I must be fudging!!

My trainer gently reminded me...that the scale may not reflect all that I'm doing. She said, she sees  progress! I am losing body fat and gaining muscles!!! So I'm definitely leaner. Which is good. My clothes don't feel any different than when I was at 204....so maybe she's right. I mean everyday I wake up and feel lighter than I've ever felt. The other thing that she's noticed and we've only been together 2 times is that I am strong!!! Many times I've heard her say "wow" under her breath. How cool is that? And last time we were together I did everything she wanted me to do....easily! I'm lifting barbells as heavy as some of the guys in the gym. Definitely smoking the ladies for sure. I even did something I've never done before...I did 30 inverted push ups, all the way to the ground, on a balance ball. Even some of the guys in the gym were checking that out. Well maybe they weren't that impressed. They were probably wondering why this trainer was abusing the old sweating, beat red lady in the corner ~ That's probably the truth!

That night after spending 40 minutes on the weights, I rowed for 10 minutes, walked for 20 minutes and I rode 10 miles on the bike ~ easy!!!

So fitness wise.....I AM HAPPY!!! 

Weight wise....well I've got some ideas and some changes I will be making soon. I just need to prepare my kitchen and get my attitude in the right place. I'm getting there!!

Anyway, my trainer asked me to do an affirmation list, of how I want to see myself....Not where I am right now....but where I want to be. So here goes....

I am a competitive, strong and fit athlete, who is injury free! I set goals and exceed them. I am a risk taker! I am diligent and purposeful in what I eat and how I fuel my body. I share my experience and help others on their health and fitness journey. Great health and fitness is my lifetime goal!

That's the list so far...I will continue to build on it as things come to my mind.

How about you...do you feel positive about yourself and your fitness goals?

Keep focused?

Monday, February 20, 2012

Had a great day!

Had a great day yesterday. I made it fun!! Well it was all about me, soooooo, it was really fun!! Ended up getting a Pedicure, spent some time in the tanning bed (I know bad, but with no sun around here, I needed a pick me up), went to the craft store and ended up having my hair done. Then I went to subway and had a sandwich and actually ate in the store. In my old days, I would never do that.....never alone. Yesterday, I felt good just sitting there enjoying my meal. Felt normal! Love that I can fit in the booth with ROOM to spare! I love that!

Because I spent some time on myself, well OK the whole day, I realized that I need to do that more often. After the day was over, I felt accomplished and fulfilled! You see, I don't take that great care of myself. The last time I had a Pedicure was in September, the last time I tanned was last May, the last time I just went to the craft store for fun and not on a frenzied shopping excursion was.....well ~ Never. I never go there for fun! The last time I got my hair done was in October and the last time I ate in a restaurant by myself ~ Never!

So even though it WAS all about me yesterday, I really needed it. I needed to get these things done. Today, I feel like a million bucks!!! And even though that scale showed .8 ounces down (which is really nothin' real) I feel like I've lost 10 pounds. A whole boat load of stress and pressure has been lifted and I feel great!

Another fun thing. Usually when I'm at a store, I'm always looking for something to Bless someone else. Usually it ends up being something to eat. Like candy for my hubby or grand children or something for my neighbors or co-workers. But yesterday, after fueling myself with healthy choices I just could not bring myself to select anything that would be unhealthy for someone else. So I wanted to get my Grand Babies something and instead of the yummy Easter candy, I chose a fun Easter coloring project. A much better choice!! They will love it!

Today, I'm off from work...Yeah for me! And I'm going to do a little bit of work around here, then it's creative time and I will end with time at the gym!!

Looking for fun today!

~*~*~*~*~*~

So while I was driving around yesterday, I don't know why it bothered me so or even why I'm telling you this, but here it goes....Anyway, while I'm driving around...it was a beautiful day. I could hear the birds chirping and a lovely tune was on the radio. Here's where I don't know what happened. Anyway, I just happened to notice this car ahead of me and I was feeling like I knew that it was making it's choices.....And in this area we have many options to choose from. We are truly Blessed as in a little amount of space, we can choose a lot of things.....There was a grocery store, a tire shop, nail place, mail place, healthy restaurants and not healthy restaurants, there's a gym, gas station etc. Really a lot of choices!! Well this car in front of me was going it's way and all of a sudden....it made a turn into the unhealthy food choice. And I'm in my car.....yelling at the top of my lungs "NOOOOOOOOOO ~ Don't do it!!!!"

If I could play it all out for you it was like the scene went from serene and wholesome to a scene of horror. DUN DUN DUNNNNNNN! Oh the horror of it all!

That's what fast food places feel like to me. I know you can(?) make a good choice at those restaurants, but for me, I need to stay away....far far far away!!!

Anyway, not sure why I needed to share that (even deleted it once), but there you have it!!

Keep focused!

Sunday, February 19, 2012

Making it fun!

I am still up about 8 pounds from my Austin trip in January. When I left I weighed in at 204 pounds and came back, after 1 week at 213. I'm still coming in at 212 pounds.....even with all of my extra focus, diligence and exercise! What in the world?

I have to take you back to when I first started. All I did to start losing pounds was journal my food and drink water. Then after a short time, I added exercise.

Back then, I did not have the fancy smancy Bodybugg, calories books, fancy fitting shoes, no BPA Free water bottles, no dry fit workout clothes, no blogs, no trainers, no nutritionists, no fancy vitamins, protein bars, no statistics, or anybody watching me...I did not have any of this.....All I had when I started was my enthusiasm....that's it and I lost weight!

The minute I got a little success I started making this journey hard. Now not only do I journal my food, but I have to make sure I get my calories under the right value, I have to drink so much water, I have to get so much exercise. I even have a thing that tells me when I did not make my goals. I have more information and tools now than I've ever had and I'm not losing weight! I'm stuck. In fact, when I really focus and really put my energies into my plan. I gain weight. HUH!?!?!?!

Somethings not right!!!

Have you ever heard of this? You know...when you get an idea about something, at least for me, when this happens I chew on it for a while. Then within a short time, I will either hear something, or someone tells me something that mirrors the same thing I'm thinking. It's like a confirmation, that what you are thinking is right. It even better when you get more than one confirmation. If I get three, then I really start listening and rethink my thinking.

So here it is......

My first thought is...."Joy, you are putting waaaay to much into all of this. You live, "eat" and breathe your weight loss and fitness plan. You schedule your whole life around getting to the gym. You plan every meal, every calorie, measuring everything. You've put so much into trying to help others that you are not even helping yourself. You are worrying every day that you are not where you want to be. You've put a lot of stress on yourself, to perform at the gym and on the scale. You've totally taken the fun out of this journey."

I was thinking back to the good old days....when I was actually losing weight and I kept thinking to myself, at that time, that this journey is so much fun! I was having a blast and could not even think why everyone wasn't doing it. Well then I mucked it up by putting so much stress and pressure on myself and worrying about my progress, that I made it no fun anymore.

So that was the first thing that made me think I'm need to make a change.

Then I ran across this scripture that helped remind me that I needn't worry:

Matthew 6:34
Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

Then finally last night, I was listening to this radio program and they had a guest on there that was saying when we put so much emphasis, stress and worry, on our plans instead enjoying the journey, it will stall out our progress. He had a lot more to say about this, but this is the one thing that caught my attention.

SO there it is again......3 times I was reminded to not worry about the plan in my life. And I am so ready to listen. So here it is.....I'm still working my plan. But what I'm not going to do is beat myself up anymore if things don't happen as fast as I want them.....("It's not a race....it's not a race!!!!") I'm going to put the fun back into my life.....I'M GOING TO ENJOY THIS PROCESS, ENJOY THE PLAN, ENJOY EATING AND EXERCISE. I'm going to have some fun with this!!

I'm taking the dread, the stress, the pressure out of my plan and replacing it with enthusiasm, miracles, excitement, and fun!

I will reach my goals, I will work hard and I will focus, but I'm going to do all this with some fun!!

Whew....feel like a load has been lifted from my shoulders.

How about you. Are you having fun with your journey?

Keep focused!

Friday, February 17, 2012

Facing my Fears

For me facing my fears has to come one step at a time. Since I'm feeling so much better and I have all of this energy....and since losing this 70 pounds expanded my life from so few options to so many...I'm finding that I want to do everything. I want to get out there and live life to its fullest. This is huge for me, because I have to over come my fears of trying new things. I'm a risk taker....but I am finding that I have to overcome old tapes in my head and remember that I'm not the same person I used to be. I'm not hindered anymore. I can move and fit in things now. I can do stuff. Now it takes me a little while to over come these fears and I find if I take one thing at a time, its manageable and really not all that scary.

For instance....
(These ladies really helped me during a rough time in my life to which I am so grateful!! See Post)

I want to row on a rowing team.....What I really want to do is row for the Senior Olympic Games. I'm old enough now so that's one step closer. So 2 years ago....that was a long time ago, I went to a row clinic and tried it. I really liked it...But while I was there, I realized that this is a really tight community and very competitive and they really did not take to new comers. So that right there is a put off. Couple that with my own insecurities regarding my health and physical strength...oh and the injuries I was battling....well that was a recipe for disaster. So I have not pursued the issue any further....Except to look at the pictures I have all over my walls of rowers at my office and of course drooling as I watched the rowers in Austin. Finally it all just got to me and I decided to do something about it.

So a couple of weeks ago I decided it was time. I also decided that instead of just joining a team as an inexperience novice, I would take some classes. You can take classes where you learn boating safety, rowing techniques and introduction to competition. I thought a little experience might help my chances! You see that was my very first tiny baby step toward my goal. Just making the decision was a biggie! Then last week I Googled the row house info and figured out what I needed to do, how much the classes cost and I found out I need to do a swim test first. So I contacted my gym made my swim test appointment and got it done last night. I had to swim for 10 minutes without stopping and then tread water for 10 minutes without stopping. Piece of cake.....I passed!!


Do you know how many times I tried to get out of getting that swim test? Lots. Why I tried, I'm not sure. I have wanted to row for at least 3 years now. It's something I WANT TO DO, yet, I'm have stopped myself many times from reaching this goal. This time, the ball is rolling and I'm closer to my goal of seeing this happen.

Do I still have fears? You bet, I have a lot more to face before I even get in the boat...Will I have the money to pay for the class, can I find parking, will they like me, will I like them, will I fit in the boat, will I do well, what if I won't really like it and on and on.... These are just a few things I'm thinking about.....but I will address each one...one at a time and I will face these fears!!

Kind of dumb to fear stuff like that huh? I know. I'm working on this!!

How about you, are you facing your fears!!

Keep focused!

Thursday, February 16, 2012

Looking Up!

Went to my fitness class last night. We do jump rope, jogging in place, jumping jacks, lunges, weights and a lot of other aerobic and balancing things. When I first started I had trouble keeping up, then gradually I was able to keep up with the young people....now, it's almost (almost) too easy!! WOW!!!

Don't get me wrong, I'm sweating like a pig, but I'm working this workout and giving it my all. I love it!! Last night we were doing this move.....like football players do. You know where you shuffle your feet and kind of hop shuffle across the floor. When I first started this class a year ago, I could not even hop. Last night, I was all over the floor. Flying across the room. NEVER thought I could do that! Never. I was so excited after my class that I ran from the facility all the way to my car and it was about 3 blocks away. Usually after the class, I'm so tired, that I'm looking for a cab to my car.

I tell you I was so excited on my way home!!

Food....Well I'm working on this. Seems I struggle....Well duh!! It's like I'm saying to myself....If you are working out hard...then you don't have to be so diligent with your food. Do you lie to yourself too?

For me right now....I have to focus on it all. So I'm on it.

You see I have a goal...and I need to get started now, if I'm going to make it!!! Right now...No more excuses!!!

I'm on it!!

How about you....are you on your plan?

Keep focused!!!

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Facing Fears

Yesterday I got to meet and workout with my new trainer. My regular trainer is getting ready to have twins, so we wanted to do the transition before the babies came ~ so yesterday was the big switch! In all these months, I did not realize that I was pretty fearful of this change. My current trainer punishes me (in a good way) every workout, so I'm kind of used to being pushed to my limit, but I realized yesterday, that this change has really been weighing heavy on me. I just did not want to try anybody new and fail. Believe me, I was looking for all kinds of excuses not to go and I was even thinking that maybe I really didn't need a trainer after all.

But I did not run away from this new challenge. I decided to face my fears and go. So glad I did. Fortunately I know my new trainer as she is my nutritionist as well. How cool is that. Almost like a 2 for 1! Anyway, we had a great session and I was really pleased that I could do everything she asked me to do....even with ease. I told her that we can even bump things up a bit and she was quite pleased!

After we were done and stretching out, she said, "You know....I don't see a lot of people, your age (I'm 50) as fit as you....you are really strong!!"

HOW COOL IS THAT!!!!!

I am really really excited to be working with her. I think she will challenge me in a different way than my trainer. I think the shake up for my body is a good good thing. So excited!!!

She is really excited to help me and said that she can totally see me at the fitness level I want for myself.

SO EXCITED!!
How about you...are you facing your fears?

Keep focused!!

Sunday, February 12, 2012

Judgement and Ridicule

This morning I had the awesome pleasure of reading blogs! On more than one occasion I came across a few where the writer experienced verbal or emotional abuse from their parents and/or friends when they were young...all because they were, in these people's eyes....fat!

I could so relate to these situations because I too was considered fat when I was a kid. You see, I was the 2nd heaviest girl in my school. I know this because when I was a kid, they would have these "health" screening days where they would weigh and measure you. I'm sure this was done in the schools as a way to help us, but the reality is, at least for me, it scarred me for life!

In the 6th grade, I weighed in at 140 pounds at 5'4"! WOW you might say, but hey, I was fully developed, yes boobs and everything!! And I was very muscular. My dad always said I was build like a brick "S***" house. I never thought that was a good thing!!!! The funny thing is....I did not look fat, but the scale said I was....so I was!?!?!?!

This weigh in started me on the long journey of low body image and diets! Yo-Yoing myself up to 274 pounds!!

Anyway, as I'm typing this right now, I have my sweet little dog "Beemer" in my lap. He's sleeping. He's the little white fluff in one of the pictures on my sidebar. Anyway, this dog love me ~ no matter what! I cannot remember anyone else, well maybe the Lord and my Hubby, who looks at me with adoring eyes. I mean they are penetrating. It's like he's is trying to tell me that he loves me with his whole being.

The sad things is.....that I probably saw those same eyes when I was first born. I'm sure my parents looked at me with wonder and awe. I bet they had those adoring eyes for me. The crazy thing is, I did not do anything at all to warrant this admiration or love. I just was born. Geez how hard is that?

Anyway, all this just began to make me wonder.....how did I go from these adoring eyes to the eyes of judgement? How did that happen? I'm mean...I am the same person, I'm good, loving, giving, etc. Just because I'm "FAT"... I get that look of disapproval? That look of judgement?

I get it, I get it, I really do....But why do we humans put so much on the outward appearance of someone. One writer said that she will never be 120 something pounds. You see she's very tall and if she got to that weight, she would most likely die as that weight is just too thin for her.

But to the world, that should not matter, because what really matters is that we should weigh 120 pounds....Huh?

Really?

I am so sick of the scale telling me who I am and what a failure I am because I'm 76 pounds away from perfect. (My stupid brain is already saying, "Wow only 76 pounds away, why that is so doable..." I want to totally finagle a way to get there. Even I can't stop myself!!

But the thing is...I may never get there.....I don't think I was ever there. When I was growing up, I truly went from 100 pounds to 140 in a flash! My body is dense, I have a lot of muscle. I sure don't want to lose that muscle just so I can see 120 pounds on a scale.

I guess what I'm saying is....My goal is not to reach for a number that somebody out there thinks is the perfect number. (Who is that somebody anyway?) I'm reaching for a fitness level. I want to be able to do any kind of sport I want. I want to be able to run and walk anywhere. I want to be able to buy clothes at regular stores. I want to get off of this blood pressure medication. I want to keep my cholesterol down. I want to feel good in my body. I want to grow old and not be a sick grandma!

If I get to 120 pounds or 140 pounds....does not matter to me....as long as I'm healthy and fit. I just want to feel good on the inside and out.

So Mr. or Mrs. "Somebody" if you don't like that I don't weigh your 120 pounds, just go pound sand!!!"""

Working my way to health and fitness.....How about you?

Keep focused!!

Thursday, February 9, 2012

Against the Wind....

In the beginning of my journey and until this very day, I naively thought that this journey of health, fitness and weight loss was a straight path to success!! I had a life threatening condition (Obesity) that needed attention....I made my mind up, I set my goals to achieve my ultimate health and fitness....I set my calorie goals, water intake, exercise plan, hired a trainer, got a nutritionist, started my blog, sought counseling, got my family and friends on board, cleaned out the crap in my house...I got my head right and I was FINALLY ready to go down the straight and narrow path to success!!

Ready....Set....Go!!!!

But there's one thing that I did not count on....one thing that I never considered and that one thing is the obstacles that I would encounter.....Going against the wind!

The following story was told to me this morning by my Hubby. He had this awesome experience I want to share with you.

He is an avid biker, bicycles that is.....well he used to be. Right now he's not in his top shape for riding, but he has been feeling the pull of the road. However, even though the pull has been strong and his desire building, he has been putting it off. You see he has had chronic insomnia for over 30 years. He averages 0 to 3 hours of sleep on a good night and sometimes there is no sleep at all. He says, that the mere fact of having so little sleep, is the very reason why he can't fulfill his dreams....reach his goals....do the very thing he loves ~ riding is bike.

I hear what he's saying and I so agree that that is a very good reason not to even try. I mean I can't even fathom that kind of problem. If I got the little bit of sleep he gets....I could not function. I need my sleep!!

Prior to the talk with my Hubby, we heard a sermon from our Pastor telling us about his depression...about his journey to wellness and overcoming this debilitating problem in his life. He told us that he feels that his depression is not a disease...a problem that only drugs can cure, but he feels that the depression is a symptom of the real problems in his life. He said the depression is an excuse to not really face those problems.

Hummm.......

So as my Hubby and I discussed this together, he went on to tell me about his bike ride he recently had. It was a beautiful Oregon morning. Sunny blue skies, crisp and bright. He donned on the proper gear, the bike was ready to go, he had enough nourishment and water...it was time! He had taken an OK ride the day before, kind of like a warm up and achieved 12 miles for his efforts. This day however, felt like it was a turning point day. Not only did he want to achieve 12 miles, but he wanted to double it!! Now keep in mind, this is a man who can easily do MS150's....That's 150 miles!! So 24 miles should be no problem. Piece of cake ~ Right?

So he sets out on his ride...and decides to take a path that he's taken before. You see....he's done this many, many times and always had great success. I mean...no problems!! Should have been no problem this day. So he sets out...He was so excited for the goal...but the one thing he did not anticipate was the obstacles in the road. He did not count on the wind!!!

On his first 12 miles, he felt great! Sunny breezy beautiful day. Here's where the obstacles came. When he turned around to start back, he did not realize how really windy it was. You see on his first 12 miles, the wind was at his back, pushing him along. There were no other obstacle...things were in order and good! It was easy. It was a straight path to his goal.

But going back the other way was a whole different story. Now he was facing the wind. He said he felt like he had entered a storm. The wind was so strong he was going no where fast!....Ever felt like that in your journey? He was working and fighting to gain some distance with very little luck. His frustration grew when a pack of bike riders flew past him, with ease, leaving him in the dust. Seems they did not realize there was a storm! At this point, my Hubby was really disappointed in himself, making things even harder to do.

Just like my journey....it seems there are those who blow right past me with their success. Seeming to make it with ease...no problems.

Hubby said, he realized it was all in his perspective. You see, he did not use the wind...he fought against it. The bike pack helped each other, encouraged each other to make it through the wind. My Hubby was fighting against it. He said it occurred to him that the obstacle is not a bad thing. He said, a sailboat captain never looks at wind as bad. It's needed. That boat won't move without it. So wind is not the problem....it's how you use it!

It was at this point, that he began to realize that this bad wind, obstacle....might not be so bad after all. This obstacle was purposeful. There was something to be learned.

All of a sudden Hubby's perceptive changed. He began to look up and and see what was really going on.

Now my Hubby is a prideful man....something he does not want to be. He makes his mind up about something and that's just the way it is. His biking goals is to approach all things in the same gear. Now he has 21 gears on his bike and these gears are supposed to help him when facing certain obstacles. But his prideful self just does not want to "rely" on these helpful tools. In your journey, have you noticed if you've been prideful in any aspect of what you are doing? So set on what you "think" is right and not willing to rely on something that may really help you? Hummmm...I'm so there!! Anyway, on this day, Hubby found that his pride was not helping him get home. He was seriously contemplating calling someone to get him. Finally he decided that he had to let go of his pride and "Switch" gears and on the bike to help him make distance. He not only switched the bike gears, but he also had to switch gears in his attitude and his thinking to get the job done. This was not a straight path home to success!

He said, "When God shows me a path, His path, I never take it. I say "Nope"...I'm doing it my way. I'm always missing what He is trying to show me. Like the little reminders that I have 21 gears to help me through. No I wanted to go my own way. Seems when I say no to Him, He just gives me a little more wind."

Soon, not only was he struggling with the wind and worried about getting home, but his knees, neck and back started to hurt and his attitude was sinking to new lows.

Then he really had to start "thinking" about the obstacles. Yeah he was experiencing one, he was not sure he was going to make it. Then finally he looked up and saw a left turn up ahead.

This was just what he needed. With new encouragement he pushed toward this new "short term" goal. Once he got to the turn, he realized that the wind was not pushing him in the face, it was not slowing him down. but maybe even helping him a little. On this turn he found that he could rest a little, but still put in the distance. He said that he felt so much joy at this turn in the road and he knew that the Lord was with him.

Much too soon, he saw that his small slice of heaven was quickly coming to an end and there, just up ahead was a right turn into the wind. He said, he started naming the turns...one stretch was Destruction Blvd, one was Stormy Circle, and Call a Cab Avenue for the turns that were in the wind and all the good stretches were called Hope Street. Cute! Anyway, he said he could not face the whole journey all at once. He said, he just had to FOCUS on each stretch, one piece at a time. He said, after each difficult stretch, he felt triumphant and joyful and he would give thanks to the Lord.

As he was getting closer and closer to home, he realized a couple of things....

  • In everything we do...there will always be twists and turns in the journey.
  • We should consider that there may be reasons for the twists, turns and obstacles. Don't let them throw you off your plan. Look to see what the Lord is trying to show you along the way.
  • Adjust your attitude. So what if the wind is blowing in your face...keep pushing through!
  • When obstacle come, we should learn how to use them to our advantage to help us reach our goals.
  • When you are on a straight path with no obstacle....there is no guiding. It's easy! It's when you have the obstacles (the winds) that come ~ that's when the guiding comes. Have to trust that the Lord knows exactly what we need and will get us to our goals.
  • Wind at your back is easy.....you're not necessarily thinking about the Lord and what he can do for you. It when you turn back and you're facing the wind (you obstacles) that you start thinking about the Lord and asking him for help. Need to focus on the Lord at all times!
  • You can't always ride with the wind!
Finally he made it home. He said that he was really grateful and realized that he was not running a race. He did not care if he comes in first, he just wanted to finish it and he did!! For me, I feel like I'm racing toward my goals and many times I have to stop myself and remind myself that this health and fitness journey is not a race. It's a lifestyle!!! I just need to get to my goals...don't care how long it takes (well honestly I kinda do care how long it takes because I don't want to waste time...it's the old do a diet and lose 20 pounds in three minutes kind of thinking that I fight all the time! That's not the kind of race I'm running!)....I just want to make sure I get there!

After my long talk with my Hubby and getting back to our Pastors sermon. What we discovered when thinking about my Hubby's insomnia is that that problem is his excuse. After much discussion we realized that the real problem, the real thing stopping him from achieving his goals is fear! That is the problem!!! The sad thing is...if he would just face his fear and get out on his bike, that the physical activity may just help him sleep. (When he does ride...he gets more sleep). So what's stopping him?

I can so relate to him because I suffer from the same problem ~ fear! It has stopped me so many times from doing things that will help me reach my goals.

So now that it's out in the open, we are going to encourage each other to break through that fear and start achieving our goals!




Other nuggets from my Hubby....He said, "The journey is not a straight path.....No where is the journey straight....You will go through the storms and winds of life! Look for the lessons that the Lord is showing you. I did not see any lesson when I was riding with the wind...I saw it only when I turned around facing the wind! Once I embraced it...I found success! I often find myself leaning on myself only...allowing my health and lack of sleep to be my crutch and my excuse! Today, I'm going to start leaning on my God and quit making excuses!!"

I so love my Hubby!

This story helped me see that the journey is not a straight path to success. It's a journey of obstacles. Even with all the tools and support I have, I'm still going to be bumped off my plan. The new thing that I learned, is sometimes there's something I need to learn during these times of obstacles. So now, instead of fighting the obstacles, I'm going to look for my lesson and even some miracles! I'm never going to take my eyes of the goal, but I will keep pushing through whatever is given to me and fight until I get there!

How about you....Do you fight the wind?

Keep focused!

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

We Can Do This!!!!

Failures are milestones on the success journey.

Each time you plan, risk, fail, reevaluate, and adjust, you have another opportunity to begin again, only better than the last time!

Becoming a Person of Influence

GOT TO KEEP PUSHING THROUGH!!
 
STAY FOCUSED!!

Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Things are Happening!!

Well even though the pounds are not just shedding off...things are happening!! I had a body comp yesterday and found that  my Percentage of Lean Body Mass went from 64% to 66.1% and my Percentagle of Body Fat went from 35.6% to 33.9%. Getting leaner!!



The real key to success and to reaching your potential lies in your ability to continually improve.
Activity alone does nothing for you.
But when you set the right goals and work to reach them instead of simply staying busy, improvement is not only obtainable ~ it’s inevitable.

Becoming a Person of Influence

 
I guess the point is..... to keep pushing toward the goal...even if  you can't see the changes. If you are diligent....focused....working your plan....THINGS WILL HAPPEN!!
 
Stay focused!

Monday, February 6, 2012

Some Inspiration

If you’re willing to stay determined, work according to plan, and keep getting up when you get knocked down, you will be able to achieve your goals ~ and someday your dreams!



Becoming a Person of Influence

Friday, February 3, 2012

Reality

I'm still up 6 pounds from my trip to Austin. Things have been so difference since I've been back. Came home the first week having to prep my house to be painted, work and just life stuff. The next week and a couple of days were spent painting and visiting with our son. This week, I've tried to get back to normal. Since Austin and with all of the busyness of life, I have been so lax on my morning Treadmill time and I've lost my variety in food selections. I feel I'm on auto pilot.....but going nowhere with my weight loss.

Just now, I have my workout clothes on....yes....I'm getting onto the Treadmill....even if it kills me....Anyway, I happen to look down and my legs looks soooo fat. I have not seen this for a while, have my legs changed that much in 3 weeks. I mean, prior to Austin, I was on the Treadmill 5-6 days per week. Since I've been back, it's been, maybe 3 days per week. (I have also made it to see my trainer and other classes, but I've been lax with the treadmill) Can this short a time, of inactivity, really make that much difference. That is scary!!!

Right now, I feel as big as I did when I weighed 274 pounds. That is a terrible feeling!

This weekend I will be facing nothing but food situations that will be out of my control. Frankly I'm worried for myself, as I can't seem to get on my path.

Anyway, all I can do for today, is make the best choices I can. I'm going to exercise, drink my water and eat my healthy food.

I will let tomorrow worry for itself and when I get there, I'm going to still make good choices and do what I know is the right thing for me.

How are you going to handle this weekend - with all the football parties and festivities?

Keep focused!

Thursday, February 2, 2012

Success

OK...I apologize. Man I hate to whine, but I could not help myself yesterday. Thanks for listening and super thank you's to those who left a comment. I have to tell you, it really made my day and helped me through!!

So the rest of my day was AMAZING!!!! I set out to do some stuff and I ACTUALLY FOLLOWED THROUGH AND GOT EVERY THING DONE!!

Hummmmm....so I can set a goal and hit it! AMAZING...I knew I had it in me!!

So prior to getting this stuff done.....each thing I had to tackle, I really had to fight to get them done. I kept thinking that I could put them off until tomorrow. I had five things on my list and I had to fight off the thought of putting them off. The most important thing was I needed to go to the gym. I really, really, really.....REALLY fought that one. But you know.....I made myself go and I'm so glad I did. I had a great work out and all during the class, I could feel my confidence grow and I just felt proud that I got this done!! Yeah me!

I also told you in my post, that I was going to get the letters back up on the wall. I did that...and this time....I'm put a lot of adhesive on those suckers. The next time they come down, they will come off with DREAM shaped sheet rock with em!!  I also said that I was going to do something to reach towards my goals - which I did by going to the gym. But I went a little further. I've been looking for a gym partner and I saw this woman at the gym, who I spoke with before and I asked her if she needed a gym accountability partner. She said yes and now I have a gym buddy. So cool!!

And finally the best part of the whole day....I did not give in and I did not accept failure!!! I pushed through!! I can really do this!

So I'm off to another successful day!

How about you?

Keep focused!

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Am I losing my ***AM?

This morning, not very happily, I got out of bed and headed for my treadmill. In the semi darkness, I got everything ready and climbed onto the treadmill and almost tripped!! Searching around I finally found the culprit. It was an "E"!

You see I have these five wooden letters on my wall, that really mean something to me. Unfortunately the first two letters fell off the wall early January and now....the third one came down.

All this kind of feels about where I am right now.  I have been struggling with getting stuff done...from being the woman I want to be....from living the life I want to live....from reaching my goals. I AM STRUGGLING!!!  So while I was on my treadmill, I was thinking about the letters falling from the wall and I was thinking....Is this a sign? Is someone telling me I've lost it. Is there something in the last two remaining letters? AM...What could they mean? What is this about?

Am I losing my DREAM?



Once again, I've got that race horse caught in the gate feeling. It's like I'm in the gate, I'm ready, I'm pushing at the gate, but it won't open. So now I'm in the stall, I'm ready to go and I'm frustrated and mad because I can't get out. I wrote about this feeling before, November 2010, and when re-reading the post, I'm realizing that....I'm in the same place as before....I'm still not ready!!

For the love!!!!.....What in the world is stopping me from at least trying to make things happen?

My hopes of rowing, of being a runner, of being the woman I want to be, of helping other people, of living the life of my dreams.....seems to be ebbing away from me........I'm losing it....I'm losing my letters!

So what do I do....well first off, I'm adhering those letter right back up on that wall and today.....I'm going to do something to reach for my goals. I'm not going to give in and accept failure. I'm pushing through!!

Can I do it? Can you?

Keep focused!