I've got some toxic people in my life right now. Both in my professional and personal life. I can't get away from them!! Bugs me soooo bad.....They make decisions in their lives...bad ones. Then when their lives fall down and they are in trouble, then they want me to fix it!?! Huh?
They blame...they look to me to fix it...they call...they cry...they beg...then one day they are up and the next down. It's a freaking roller coaster!!! And they want me to get in the car and ride the dang thing with them. AND I'M NOT GOING TO DO IT!
First of all the people who are toxic in my life....did not ask me first before they made their stupid decisions. You know....get help BEFORE they destroy their lives. Then how come, when their decisions don't work for them, then, why do they come to me for help? They want help ~ when it's too late....Like I can do ANYTHING for them now. I can't!!!
And I refuse, once and for all, to take on their burdens, their problems, their troubles on my shoulders. I'm not doing it!!!
THIS IS SOO HARD!! Because being a Christian, I struggle that if I don't give in and sacrifice for them, then I'm not doing the right thing in the eyes of the Lord. I struggle, struggle, struggle......struggle with this!!
However, here's the difference for me......I am wiling to help others and I do it all the time. I volunteer at the Rescue Mission, give money to Missionaries, give money to my church. We have given groceries, money and even cars to family members in NEED.
Where the struggle is are the people who are always hanging on, always draining you, always in crisis ~ because of their stupid decisions, always out there with their hands out......wanting!!
I just can't do it anymore!
The reason why I'm not helping them, why am I doing this now? Because some of these people having been doing this my whole life and I'm not giving any more of my life to them. So far, it has not done any good, so what's the point? The other thing...if I'm giving myself to a lost cause, then that means I'm taking away from what I NEED in my life.
These people have affected my family, my health (mental health ~ because they make me crazy and depressed & physical health~ because in the past, what they do to me, makes me want to eat!), and they have affected my life...and not in a positive way. And I'm not doing it anymore!!!
From this moment, I am limiting my interactions with these people. Once a month wellness checks, birthday and holiday cards and that's it. I have caller ID on my phone and I don't have to take their calls. I can delete their phone and email messages. I don't have to be subjected to their drama, their crisis, their problems any longer!!
I so want to delete this.....because it sounds sooo MEAN!!!!!!!! I hate that I feel this way with the people I love, but I really can't do it anymore. I can't move on my with my own health because they are pulling me down. I so try not to let what they are doing affect me, but I can't seem to stop them from wearing me down. In the beginning, I thought I could help. I had resolve that I could do this, but they have pushed too far!!
Now I do feel like I'm on the roller coaster.....only I'm going down....If I stay on it....how many more times will I get a chance to do this life for me? It's always been about them....But it's my time....my time right now!!
If I can't do this for me now....I will die. Then what good will I be to anyone?
Do you have toxic people in your life? Are you ready to get rid of them and take care of yourself?